Then Tommy saw me and looked me up and down and furrowed his brow. He put his hands on my muffin top (which I'm kind of sensitive about, anyway) and told me to suck it in. I told him I can only suck in my belly, not my sides. (!!!) He looked at my chest and sighed, then told me to turn to the side and looked at my mama belly and my ratty old jeans. The look on his face said he did not approve of what he saw. I started to get defensive because I was not about to be told I was too embarrassing to to go shopping with at 7pm at a Walmart, and I wasn't very happy with him thinking he got preapproval of my outfits anyway.
Then he did something strange. He grabbed my left hand and checked my wedding ring and said, "I guess it's okay since you have that on. I was worried you'd leave it at home." And then I realized that he thought I looked too sexy to go out in public! I even asked him, "Are you saying that I might attract men and they need to be able to see that I'm married?" He looked at me like he thought I was crazy. "You sound like you're taking that as a compliment. Okay then, but I dont see how it's a good thing."
He saw me, whom he apparently thinks is pretty, in clothes he saw as flaunting my figure, and got concerned that I might attract too much male attention.
I know it sounds weird, but when he thought I looked dangerously good all dressed like a schlub, it made me feel really good. I need to stop thinking I look okay despite my flaws, and start thinking that they're not flaws and that I just look good, period.
*Did you know that when you write it with an X, you "take the Christ out of Christmas" and it becomes a secular holiday?
