Saturday, June 04, 2016

I'm almost 40

I'm almost 40, my daughter just graduated high school, turned 18, and got her first (only?) tattoo all in the same week, and I've been reflecting on life because of all of it. And you know what I've decided?  Life is too short to match your bra to your panties. Here's a small key to happiness; find panties that you love, buy 20 pairs of them, and shove them all in the same drawer. Don't fold your underwear- that's a waste of time.  Now, find a bra you like and buy 5 of it. In a color close to your skin tone so it doesn't stand out against a white blouse. Then, shove them in a drawer. Now, when you want to get dressed, put on your bra without looking, grab a pair of panties, and then spend your time on the clothes people will see. "But what if I meet Johnny Depp and he wants to hook up? Won't I wish I was wearing cute and uncomfortable underwear?" No. You're not going to happen upon Johnny Depp today; he's not going to abandon his plans for the day because you fill him with uncontrollable lust, and if you do possess that kind of lusty power over men, your underwear isn't going to kryptonite it all to hell. You can slip them off with your pants, anyway.  If a man is lucky enough to see you in your bra and panties, he is in no position to judge them. He should thank his lucky stars and toss them to the floor.

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