Ryan is 13, which is that magical age where she no longer calls me her best friend, and is simulaneously humiliated to know me. I try to temper the heartache of the first part by totally taking advantage of the second, which is why Ioften embarrass her in public on purpose. Or at least, I don't try to avoid it like I probably should. Case in point: we were walking through Walmart and she was walking much faster than I, about ten feet ahead, desperately hoping no one would know I was with her. I assume the alternative was that some fat gray-haired lady just randomly decided to stalk this uber-cool and independant 13 year old who happened to be at Walmart by herself with no cart. Anyway, there she was, power-walking while I practically ran to catch up, so I just had to talk to her. Loudly. About stupid stuff.
Me: Hey, let's get you a Lady Gaga poster!
Ryan: No! I don't like Lady Gaga!
Me: But honey, she was born that way! As a motorcycle handlebar. And she's overcome it! She's a role model!
Ryan: Mo-om!
Showing posts with label embarrassment. Show all posts
Showing posts with label embarrassment. Show all posts
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
teach your kids life, really
Can I just say that in my opinion, if you are 30 years old and the parent of 2 children and you blush and giggle when buying toilet paper and pads and make your husband buy all condoms and lube, you need to be put in a supervised care facility or group home. I seriously have to question your maturity and judgment if you get embarrassed buying hygiene products. I just read this on a message board for personal advice after pregnancy:
Wow! As embarrassing as all this is to me, it is SO stinking helpful!! I thought I was the only one that sex was this painful for. I hate it sometimes, more than half the time, the reason I don't want to do it, is because I don't want to deal with the pain it causes after. So lube helps huh?? WOW. Now the problem is buying it!! I still will not even buy condoms!! I can't take it, I get so embarrassed. I am just to stinking modest. I tell David if he wants to have sex, then make sure he buys condoms. We are not doing it without them, and Im not buying them!!! My favorite part of pregnancy is not having to buy pads! I ALWAYS make sure to go to a female checkout stand, even if the line is twice as long, just because it helps me a little bit!
I used to think this particular woman was just a normal housewife but now I think maybe she has some high-functioning disability, like mild Downs or something. Or maybe she was home schooled.
Back when I was single, I had a test for guys. If I thought things were getting serious, not just exclusive but really "Is he the one?" serious, I would ask him to pick me up a box of tampons at the store. Usually I'd call while I was at work or whatever, but I'd find a way for it to be a reasonable favor to ask. If he bought them for me, he was mature enough to keep considering. If he freaked out and acted all 8th grade about it, he wasn't. (What is the check-out person going to think, that some guy is putting tampons up his butt, or that he's buying them for a girl?) For the record, I found out years after my ex passed the test that he'd made his best friend go in the store and buy them for me. Not surprising, knowing what I now know.
Wow! As embarrassing as all this is to me, it is SO stinking helpful!! I thought I was the only one that sex was this painful for. I hate it sometimes, more than half the time, the reason I don't want to do it, is because I don't want to deal with the pain it causes after. So lube helps huh?? WOW. Now the problem is buying it!! I still will not even buy condoms!! I can't take it, I get so embarrassed. I am just to stinking modest. I tell David if he wants to have sex, then make sure he buys condoms. We are not doing it without them, and Im not buying them!!! My favorite part of pregnancy is not having to buy pads! I ALWAYS make sure to go to a female checkout stand, even if the line is twice as long, just because it helps me a little bit!
I used to think this particular woman was just a normal housewife but now I think maybe she has some high-functioning disability, like mild Downs or something. Or maybe she was home schooled.
Back when I was single, I had a test for guys. If I thought things were getting serious, not just exclusive but really "Is he the one?" serious, I would ask him to pick me up a box of tampons at the store. Usually I'd call while I was at work or whatever, but I'd find a way for it to be a reasonable favor to ask. If he bought them for me, he was mature enough to keep considering. If he freaked out and acted all 8th grade about it, he wasn't. (What is the check-out person going to think, that some guy is putting tampons up his butt, or that he's buying them for a girl?) For the record, I found out years after my ex passed the test that he'd made his best friend go in the store and buy them for me. Not surprising, knowing what I now know.
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