It's not about the piss

To all of the men who pee and then don't wash their hands because they didn't get any pee on their hands, You touched your junk. There are junk germs all over your hands. You touch the door, my kids touch the door, now my kids have your junk all over their hands. Just wash your damn hands. It's not that we don't want your pee (but we don't), it's that we don't want your wiener cooties! Nobody wants your wiener cooties!