Thursday, December 16, 2010

Turnabout is supposed to be fair play, right?

Have you ever been part of a mocked demographic? I have, and I admit that, while I'm not proud of it per se, I tend to not be so upset when the pedulum swings the other way.

When I nursed Ryan 12 years ago I was accused of incest, selfishness, and was told to go nurse in private. I fed her in dressing rooms, cars in parking lots, bathrooms, and in one case the manager's office in a restaurant. I have very little pity for women who choose to formula feed and get comments about it. Aside from the fact that I tend to agree with the comments (You seriously expect no one to judge you for choosing to feed your baby chemicals over milk?), I think the pro-formula side deserves to feel a little of what they made the pro-milk side feel for so long.

I am a stay at home mom. I am told, directly and indirectly, that I am lazy, a leach on my husband, a disgrace to feminism, and that I do not contribute anything to my family. So when I read about working mothers feeling like they're being judged for leaving their kids with sitters, I don't jump to their defense as much as I should. Probably because working mothers are the ones who tend to judge me.

I don't think white people should be passed over for jobs because they're white, or that straight people should be called "Breeders" and run out of certain neighborhoods, or that anyone should be treated unfairly at all. But it's hard to feel sympathy for an oppressed group that has been the oppressors in the past (or even sometimes still are). So I'm sorry for giggling when a man complains about the media putting an unfair expectation of beauty out there. But seriously, after years of airbrushed photos everywhere, guys are suddenly going to whine about the perfect pecs on GQ?! Are you kidding me?

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