Heather: I found a small dead mouse next to my couch this morning. Gross!
Me: Whatever you do, don't try to imagine what might have killed it.
Lynn: A bigger mouse!
Me: genetically modified lab rats!
Heather: I wasn't thinking about that until now. Double Gross!!
Me: Maybe it was a mousey gangland turf war.
Kim: It doesn't take much to cause the little buggars to have a heart attack... Maybe one of you stumbled into the bathroom last night and scared the crap outta it.
Me: If they drink beer, they die. They can't burp and their stomachs explode. You probably spilled a drop of killer beer in the recycling bin.
Heather: I don't drink at home.
Me: If I were you, and I lived in the middle of a rodent gangland turf war, I'd start.